Moving on

I started writing a less personal version of this post and it was so boring I was falling asleep trying to write it. I realized that if I want this post to be worth my time writing it and your time reading it then I am going to have to be a little vulnerable and actually open up.

Those of you who know us personally know that we have been hoping to buy my grandma’s home, the one we have been living in for the past, almost eight years. It has been both a blessing and a struggle to be here with my grandma. I love that my kids have such a close relationship with her. And we have really enjoyed the acre of land, mostly because of the mature fruit trees and all the space for gardening. But it has been hard being in someone else’s space, not being able to make changes we want to make.

We have considered moving many times but haven’t because we felt like this is were we were supposed to be. About two years ago I was really struggling with the state of limbo we were in, so I was praying about it and I got a really clear impression asking, “Could you stay for two more years?”. And I thought, yes, I could do two more years. It was all I needed to keep going a little longer. But then as that time got closer we started wondering what the next step would be. Obviously we were hoping that something would move forward with this place, we pushed and prodded but it just wasn’t happening.

So, we started looking at other houses. My husband had started looking long before I did, I guess I was still holding out a hope that things would work out in the current situation. I was struggling to come to terms with the fact that things were not going to happen the way I had planned. I had to let go of that dream and I also had to allow myself to grieve. It seems a little silly to write that out, but do you know what I mean? Have you ever had to grieve for a lost dream/plan? Well, silly or not, once I admitted that I was sad but that I had to let it go, it made it a lot easier for me to move on, and start thinking about what I really wanted.

I trusted in my loving Heavenly Father to look out for me. I don’t believe that he puts us into situations so much as that he allows us to be in them. But I also believe that if we put our trust in him, he will make them what we need in order to grow and learn, to find peace and joy. I wanted to do his will, but I also understood that my desires are important to him. And if I wanted inspiration from him I knew I needed to study the situation out and decide what my desires were.

We started looking at houses about that same time and it became apparent that I was not yet clear on the things that were important to me. So, I started writing lists of things that I liked or wanted in my home. Then I started thinking about what things I could do without. I ranked my list items in order of importance. I looked at the houses on the market and I talked to my husband about what he wanted as well.

Well, this probably doesn’t need to be stated, but I’ll say it anyway, this is a terrible time to get into a first time home. The housing market is nuts right now. And it is a seller’s market, for sure. Homes are selling for way more than asking price within hours of being on the market. If you don’t know exactly what you want and jump on it you will miss the opportunity. If you aren’t willing to spend more than the asking price, you are just out of luck. It is crazy. So, we were getting a little discouraged. But luckily we didn’t have a deadline for moving out, so we just settled back and decided to be patient until we found exactly what we were looking for.

Well, about a week or two after we decided just to patiently wait, we got a text from a guy in our ward (congregation) who was moving. He had mentioned to the bishop that he was going to put his house up for sale and the bishop told him that we had been looking for a house. So he texted us before he listed his house.

We were very excited to go look at the house. The chance to live in the same area and stay close to all the friends we have made in the last 8 years had us thrilled. But would we like the house? We already knew that the yard would not be as big. We would be going from an acre to 0.26 acres. But we also know that we don’t need as much garden as we have been doing. We just do it because we have had the space to.

Of course we were praying about it all the time and thinking about it, and talking about it non-stop until we went to look at it. I knew that I would need a pretty direct sign that this was the direction we were meant to go, so I was very clear on what the house needed to have in order for us to consider it. The main things were, enough space for a garden, enough space to plant fruit trees, space for Tyler’s tools in the garage, and space for our food storage, oh, and 4 bedrooms would be nice as well. I figured everything else I could deal with or change. There is not going to be a perfect house no matter how long you look.

So, with those things firmly decided we went to look at the house. Miraculously, it had all of those things! Admittedly, it is an older home so it will need some updates, but not nearly what we would have had to do to my grandma’s home. Also, there are some features that I never would have looked for or asked for that I think we are really going to love, like the wall of windows on the side facing the valley. I can’t wait to see the sunsets!

It is amazing to me how right it feels. Not so much that it was a strong, YES, just that it wasn’t a no. There was no feeling that something wasn’t right, like I felt with other houses we looked at. The more we thought about it the more comfortable we got with it. So we offered to buy it. We agreed on a price and things have been moving forward since then. We will be moving in about a month, if everything continues to proceed as expected.

It has been a crazy time for us. We have felt the love and guidance of our Heavenly Father in all of it, even the parts that were not fun. We never would have seen this in our future two years ago. But that is how life goes sometimes. You can’t really see what is down the road until you get a little closer to the bend in the road.

So, I don’t have any pictures yet, but in the coming weeks and months you will be seeing all of our progress putting in a garden where there hasn’t been one. We are also going to be planting trees and a few other things. Basically, I will try to give you a front row seat of all the fun things we will be doing and growing. Thanks for reading this! If you would like to know more details feel free to ask.